The time has come to say goodbye...

The time has come to say goodbye.  This has been our little home away from home these past 35 days – and seeing as it's Valentine’s Day, we’re spreading the love.

When we first arrived one of the staff said, “If you need anything, you let us know…we’re like family here.”  This could not have been a truer statement.  The kindness and hospitality of the staff has been the greatest joy of this experience.  So thank you Better Being!

From Dr. Torsak and my morning entourage..

To the super sweet (and funny!) nurses...

To Dr. Worowit (we used our time during acupuncture to teach him some American slang, like hitches, as in 'we don't need any more hitches,' and foodie, as in 'yes, the food network is still on...because we are foodies!')...

To the nutrition team...

All of the customer service staff...

The lovely ladies who clean our room everyday...

And of course all of the PT crew…who I sadly don’t have a picture with.

It is with much love and gratitude that we say goodbye.  But I’m ready to come home and start the next chapter of this journey.  Farewell Bangkok, you will not be forgotten.

California Stars by Billy Bragg and Wilco.  California…I’m coming home.

Farewell, my love

Today was the last swim.  The pool has definitely been my most favorite part…if only it would fit in my suitcase.

I thought I'd share one last happiness in action...

So, farewell my love.  Until we meet again...

Fare Thee Well by Oscar Isaac & Marcus Mumford.  Because goodbyes are always bittersweet - bitter because it's over and sweet because, for a moment, you were mine.

Finding Balance

This final week has been about putting all the pieces together.

On Tuesday we met with Dr. Torsak to discuss some test results and various reasons why my body had such an extreme reaction to the spinal injections (my aftermath is not the norm).  It comes as no surprise that my test results also indicated that I am not the norm (at least I'm consistent).  The tests showed a high level of inflammation in my body, a wildly upside down inter to outer cellular water ratio (basically weak cellular membranes are not allowing the cells to retain water), and some nutrient deficiencies (iron, vitamin D).  Put it all together and I have a rather compromised immune system – my body is not equipped to respond to stressors, so when it encounters stress the impact is more severe and it takes much longer for my system to recover.

After injections, the stem cells basically go to the bone marrow and 'hang out' while they mature and wait for a signal from the body for what it needs – and this maturation stage can take up to three months.  However, as long as the body is compromised the only signal it will get is to respond to the immediate inflammation.  So, step one is to get my body healthier – which fortunately isn't that complicated.  Following the nutritional plan and continued physical therapy will do the trick – and some time of course.  Then step two will be to get those stem cells to start regenerating some strength!  It's a doable plan – it's just going to take some diligence, some consistency, and a few tough changes in my day to day lifestyle.

Speaking of tough changes, on Wednesday we met with the nutritionist again.  The first time we met she gave me a homework assignment...to create some sample meal plans for when I get home...and, being the procrastinator that I am (my roommate didn't call me a slacker in college for nothing), I finally got around to doing my homework this week.

The good news is, I got an 'A' on my assignment.  The bad news is, the diet is COMPLICATED.  Each day I have to eat three balanced, diversified meals that altogether break down to:

13 portions of protein

4 portions of non- starchy vegetables

1/2 portion of a starchy vegetable

1 portion of fruit

1/2 portion of a grain

1/2 portion of a low fat dairy

2 portions of nuts and seeds

4 portions of avocado

6 teaspoons of olive oil

1 tablespoon of coconut oil

While I have had very little starchy vegetables or grains here (occasionally I get a few pieces of potato or a small amount of quinoa), when I'm home I can have a few carbs each day...like 1/4 cup of rice or half a piece of bread (I will take what I can get...and yes, strategically using these precious carbs is going to become a daily highlight!).

However, you may have noticed that sugar is not on the menu...and although they don't expect you to adhere to a firm never the loss of my beloved daily 'treat' is something that required a little grieving.  I felt rather sad about it after the nutrition meeting – a lot sad.  The AMA stages of grief began with a walk down memory lane and a tribute to my favorite bites of the year.

Gosh those were good.  Then we wallowed for a minute in the heartbreak of having to further restrict an already restricted life – especially when my sweet treats aren't just an enjoyable indulgence; I have a passion for the process.  Baking is my thing – and I've spent a lot of time perfecting my craft.

But we finally found our acceptance in balance.  A wise soul told me that living a balanced life is far healthier for your whole being than restricting yourself to an extreme to benefit just one aspect of your being.  So never is not going to be a part of the new regime, but occasional will – and I'm confident that I can learn to live with that.  It's still going to be a difficult adjustment though.

The need for balance has been a bit of a recurring theme on this journey – a need for emotional balance...physical balance...lifestyle balance.  And the real test is going to be when I get home – to see if I can find a way to balance this new lifestyle (a lifestyle of self-care and discipline) with my old (which still has all the same demands of work, family, friends...and my own desire for a bit of fun and spontaneity).  But it is, after all, the equilibrium of opposites that creates balance.  Which, if you think about it, means we really can have it all – just not all the time.

So, I have my work cut out for me…but I’m feeling good and I’m coming home equipped with lots of new knowledge, new tools and some memorable new felt experiences – not to mention all of my new cells!  We practice balancing in the water.  They turn the jets on and you have to stand in the current and keep your balance with the core of your body.  At first this was really hard…but I’m getting better, and we’ve inched our way closer and closer to the jet.

simply grand, darling!

We've been here for a month today...and since it's Sunday, the occasion called for an outing (I'm getting a little better at outings!).  I took the liberty of choosing the day's events and I decided that we needed a little pampering (Did I mention that Sundays don't come with hot water?  It's just another special Bangkok quirk).  So, after our cold showers, we headed to the Grand Hyatt Hotel for a bit of spa treatment and a small treat!

The Grand Hyatt was quite lovely.  We enjoyed a facial at the i.sawan spa...which was so so enjoyable.

Afterwards, we took a tour of the hotel and the adjacent Erawan Mall.

And then we had an afternoon treat in the Garden Lounge (a smidge of cheating is permitted on Sunday…says I).  I love that cups of tea here come with a small complimentary morsel.  I think all tea should be served this way. 

Overall, the afternoon was like a little breath of fresh air...I'm starting to feel like I'm getting the hang of this Bangkok thing.  Of course we will be leaving in 6 days, 16 hours and 35 minutes...but who's counting?

Preparing for Company

More stem cells arrived on Friday.  We have a little routine here that on stem cell days we prepare for company...mom always says, Company is coming from China today, are you ready?

With only two treatments left, I've been trying to keep myself in the right frame of mind and make the most of these last injections and the time left.  Since I've been feeling better (such a nice change of pace!), I decided to get back to what I like to do best...create!  I have another favorite meditation that says the healing process is creative.  (And of course, in my world, creative equals time for crayons!).  So this is how I prepare for company...

The IV injection is a breeze compared to the lumbar.  We had tea while we waited...

And then Dr. Torsak stopped by for the delivery.  Quick, painless…and relatively side effect free!

Mixing It Up

Today we decided to mix it up.  We had the morning off from therapies, and seeing as the mother was starting to develop a serious case of 'cabin fevah,' we went out!  A couple blocks down the street from us is a mall called the Emporium.  It's kind of fascinating that amidst the rather unglamorous chaos that is the streets of Bangkok, your taxi can pull in front of an unassuming cement building and inside you'll find what can only be described as South Coast Plaza on steroids.  The Emporium is six levels of everything from Cartier and Chanel to Louis Vuitton and Fendi.

The upper level is a food market and there was lots to look at...and even some old familiar choices, like Krispy Kreme and my beloved Starbucks (sadly there was no protein box).  The best, however, was a little restaurant that looked like something out of Moulin Rouge and whose sign proudly proclaimed 'Italian Food – Clothing – Foot Massage – Coffee and Desserts.'

Oh, and just in case you're wondering, they do have an accessible bathroom at the Emporium (sans toilet paper and soap, of course)...but I think that still counts as progress.

A love letter to life...

My Dearest Life,

I’ve been thinking of you, and all the things I love about you.

I love that you gave me a mother who is unwavering and fierce in her beliefs.  She never fails to be calm under pressure and if I lose my focus for even a second, I can rest assured that she will point me in the right direction.  (She is also a strong proponent of good fun that is funny…and knows how to lighten even the dullest of days!)

I love that you gave me my family and loved ones.  To be surrounded by such steadfast support is something for which I will always be grateful.  There is a song that I think of often that says, the days are darker than the dark dark nights, so we hold hands and dance till we shine – this always makes me think of my lovely ones.  They cheer me on.  Entertain me with their stories.  Make me laugh.  Remind me that I am loved.  And even with eight thousand miles between us, they stand in the darkness with me and hold my hand…and help me find the light.

I love that you gave me the opportunity to have this experience and the potential it holds for positive change.  I love that you surrounded me with the kindest of people here – each one unique and warm and loving.  Whether it’s the nurses or the doctors or the PT staff, they all continue to encourage me.  They sit next to me on my bed, they rub my hand, they tell me to fight, they smile and they laugh.  This is one of the things about life that I love most and have always loved about working at Friendship Shelter – the opportunity to witness the endless array of unique people that exist in this world.  No two are the same.  Each is beautiful in his own right.  And even the ones that seem hard to take at times will surprise you eventually.  The goodness is in everyone – if you look for it.

I love that you have given me these new cells.  That they are at home now in me and they are going to flourish and thrive.  It’s kind of remarkable if you think about how this is all made possible…and that it starts with a random stranger – in China.

I love that you have given me so much beauty to gaze upon.  Even though I don’t get to see much of nature at the moment, my heart remembers.  I love puffy white clouds…the kind you could swim in or eat with a giant spoon.  I love garden roses in full bloom…and dahlias, lots of dahlias.  I love birds that perch and chirp and hop about.  I love trees, and the perfect color of green that the sun creates when it shines on a leaf.  And I love the sunset over the ocean and the color of blush in the sky that only the heavens can create.

I love that you gave me so many ways to enjoy the talents and creativity of others – music, shows, movies, books.  I’ve had a bit of time to pass and I’ve had so many opportunities to see what other people are doing in the world with their time and energies.  I’ve watched hours of the food network, traveling across the world to see people’s culinary imaginations come to life.  I’ve been entertained by movies I haven’t seen in years.  I’ve laughed with Ellen.  And let’s not forget those voices and those sounds that bring me peace and joy and comfort…like really nothing else can.

And lastly, I love that you have given me everything that I need.  I am safe.  I am well-kept.  I am internally rich, equipped with a wealth of resources.  And I am loved.  So my dearest life, today my heart is full of gratitude…for you.

With love,

Me

Oven by Seven Mary Three.  If my soul had a sound, it would sound like Jason Ross.  I’ve had a love affair with this voice since I was probably fifteen – my brother gave me a Seven Mary Three CD, and at the time I had no idea what a significant part of my being this voice would become.  Somehow, I always find my way back to it.

Down Time

The third spinal injection was Friday and it unfortunately had a pretty rough aftermath again.  I woke up feeling okay, but after a small amount of exertion, I was down for the count…again.  Unwavering headache and nausea was followed by two days of IV fluids and a series of dexamethasone shots.

But we’re hanging in there…and I’ve decided, as we enter into our final two weeks here, that I have had enough spinal injections.  We will be flying home on the 15^th and I cannot imagine making a fifteen plus hour trek across the Pacific feeling like this.  I’ve decided I would rather get better and focus the time we have left on the benefits of the therapies.  So, I changed my last two injections to IV injections, as I respond much better to these, and I will still get the benefit of additional stem cells before we leave.  I feel really good about this decision – kind of like a small weight has been lifted.

In other news, I have had plenty of time to think during my down time, and up next we’re focusing on gratitude – as we all know the best attitude is an attitude of gratitude (Right, buddy!?).

So, stay tuned…

Adjusting Perspectives

Transformation is not for the faint of heart.  Some days I feel at a disadvantage in this department. 

The diet is hard.  And it's not just the longing for those comfy carbs (my new favorite pastime is 'remember when we ate...'  Remember when we ate chicken fingers and french fries with chocolate malts in Michigan with Uncle Joe? That was good. Really hit the spot.  Remember when we made waffles at the shelter and I ate the first one, golden and perfect, right out of the iron?  That was amazing.  It's kind of like self-inflicted torture...but I can entertain myself for hours with this game).  There are other aspects of the diet that are hard on my body...my stomach, my digestion and my energy level to name a few.  It's quite an adjustment.  It's a lot of food (more calories than I typically eat), a lot of protein, not a lot of fiber, and a lot of unusual flavors (turns out I have a very finicky palette!).  Oh, and did I mention that getting to talk about your bowel movements with total strangers is another daily perk of this experience?  I have no less than three people ask me each day how many poo poo?  It's delightful.

But, leave it to life to rub it in that I am human – with a human body.  Why is it so hard for me to accept this reality?  I find myself continually distraught over the realities of human bodies.  Their functions.  Their shapes.  Their feelings.  I find it all so uncomfortable – and I don't like discomfort.  It dampens my spirit, forces me to sit in reality...and I am not a realist.  I am a dreamer...I thrive on the imagine if and wouldn't it be nice if.  I much prefer the idea of miraculous transformation and the mystical wonders of the world to the science of the human body and how it actually functions.  Somebody once told me that you can manifest any of your desires, but if you want more money you can't just wish it into being...you actually have to put money in the bank.

Well, turns out, if you want to change your body you can't just wish it into being, you actually have to do something different...even if it's temporarily uncomfortable.  I can tell you though...some days it's fricken hard.  You hear all these stories of people who have made remarkable transformations – overcoming injuries, battling diseases, weight loss, you name it – I have so much respect for these people when I think about what they must have endured to get where they are.  But I take comfort in the fact that people do do it.

A big part of this week has been adjusting expectations and perspectives.  This is not a quick process.  This is not an easy process.  When I first arrived I met a woman who was in her last week here and she had this air of disappointment to her.  I remember her husband saying that she was really hoping to be able to walk when she left here, but it's a lot harder for adults to see quick results.  The more time you spend here the more you learn – and it's a lot more realistic to expect improvements over the next 6 months to a year.  This is kind of like a 30 day crash course in a new way of living (a new way of thinking), and then it's up to you to take it home and implement changes in your everyday life that nurture and support the development of your new cells – and hopefully keep them healthy longer – while you continue to rebuild your body.  This is kind of just the beginning.

I was reminded today that I've made it my life's work to help other people change their lives – apparently I'm supposed to know a thing or two about how this works.  One of the things that we know to be true at the shelter is: attitude is everything.  I think I need to take my own advice – everybody has their own program, keep your eye on the prize, be kind to others (and yourself!), try your very best...and take it one day at a time.

Lifting the block...

I've had writer's block.  I've been trying to decide what to write for the last week and I've come up blank every time.  The reason?  I've been in a bit of a funk.  My fellow Pisceans are probably familiar with the phenomenon that is the funk.  Sometimes we just find ourselves in an emotional twist...and it takes a while to get untwisted.  

The good news is that I have some of my kinks ironed out, so now we can talk about how the week has progressed:

Last Friday I had the second spinal injection.  Ironically, the actual injection was a bit rockier than the first, but the aftermath was far less severe.  I could feel this injection more than the first time (they did a second shot of anesthetic halfway through because I could feel it too much!) and I ended up sleeping from 6pm until the next morning.  As a preventative measure, they did an IV the whole night and into the next day and gave me a dose of dexamethasone every four hours.  This seemed to work, as I did not have nearly as much nausea or headache as before.

On Sunday I was feeling well enough that we decided to venture out.  This was pretty much our first time leaving the hospital since we arrived (if you don't include the walk we took around the block on day three).  We treated ourselves to teatime at The Four Seasons (and yes, I cheated a little bit and had a warm buttery scone with strawberry jam...it went quite nicely with my earl grey tea!).  

But, unfortunately, amidst the grandeur of The Four Seasons I was in complete internal melt down mode – and my panic decided to stay for the remainder of the day (and a bit into the next).  Honestly, the problem (in typical AMA form) came back to those godforsaken bathrooms.   Bangkok does not do accessible...not even in a five star hotel.  And while it was still all fine (challenging, but fine), I had worked myself into such a state of frenzy over the entire issue...to the point that I felt panicked even in the taxi thinking what if I have to go to the bathroom, there is nowhere I could go.  In my defense...we all have to use the bathroom, and when you take away the luxury of not having to think about it, and you realize that in an 'emergency' it would probably take a crew of civilians and a complete loss of your privacy to get you to a bathroom...you kinda panic.  Now granted, I definitely went overboard – but it does really make you wonder, what do other people do?  Clearly, as my experience here at Better Being can attest, physical limitations do not discriminate by country – there are people here from Canada, Poland, Italy, Malawi, Chile, and many others.  Surely there are Thai people in Bangkok with physical difficulties...what do they do?

For now, I've decided not to think too much about the next 'outing.'  There is, after all, only so much a person can handle – and I think I have plenty on my plate right here within these Better Being walls.

So, after my extra-large dose of panic, I decided to duke it out with my nemesis: the oxygen chamber.  I lost.  (Sad, I know.)  I was starting to feel rather unwell again, lots of nausea and the pressure in my ears was off.  The oxygen chamber is pressurized and you have to clear your ears a lot on the way up and down...it usually returns to normal afterwards, but something did not feel right after this last time.  So, they gave me the week off from HBOT (secretly, I was sort of thrilled), but I feel like the oxygen chamber won...at least this round.

What's going well, you ask?  There's still a lot of silver linings…if you look for them.  I’ve had to make it my business to look for them.  

The pool is still great…and I’m still in love.  I’ve had a chance to work with quite a few different therapists (Beer, Ploy, Bee, and another gal).  They all have their own styles which is kind of fun.  Ploy and I are stretching…

We went for another walk yesterday and found a small slice of nature and a market that sells everything from Frosted Flakes to Magnum Ice Cream Bars (it’s good to know they’re there…you know, in an emergency)…

And, the staff continues to be sweet, encouraging and attentive.  I have an entourage of supporters that greet me every morning in my room and make me tell them that I’m doing great! (with extra exclamation).

Oh, and I discovered this little gem today...instant silver lining.  You might say it helped lift the block.

Summer Light by The Cave Singers

Winning!

My new motto is fight fight fight!  I feel a little bit like I'm channeling Meg Ryan in You've Got Mail (the answer to your question is: go to the mattresses)...if you don't know what I'm talking about, you should probably stop reading this and promptly find yourself a copy...it's highly entertaining.

Anywho, on Thursday I started feeling like my old self was returning.  We were done with the IVs, the nausea was gone, the headache was mild...and I had an ever so small piece of chocolate (shhhh...don't tell anyone!).  So I decided I needed to get back in the game, and that needed to start with a motivating mantra (I'm big on mantras...I think they're super helpful).  So I said to myself, self, you're just gonna fight fight fight until you get beyond this (and then I had a little vision of Kathleen Kelly pumping her fist in the air with triumph).

And that's how my motto was born.  Since then it's come in quite handy.  I use it when I'm doing occupational therapy and I feel like that pesky headache is rearing its ugly head...or when I'm stuck in that oxygen chamber and trying to keep the panic at bay...or when I am swirling around the pool being asked to do things that defy what I think should be possible.

We’re in it to win it now, so…fight fight fight!

Home

Weight of Your World by Roo Panes.  Not feeling your best...in a foreign country...can make you feel a little homesick from time to time.  This song came on today and it made me miss you.

I miss the smell of fresh air...the feel of sunshine on my face...the sound of birds outside my window.  I miss tea time at Peet's and gelato at Dolce and food – real honest to goodness food.  I miss the smell of clean laundry, my lovely little shower, and the bottle of Crystal Geyser water that sits on my counter at home, beckoning to be drank.  I miss the comfy white chair in my living room, binge watching Gilmore Girls, and a proper cup of tea...in a real tea cup.  I miss the visits with my bestie, the laugh of my buddy, and the sight of my favorite smile peering around my office door.

I think there is truth in needing to be at home within ourselves...wherever we are.  But I am a creature of comfort, a creature of habit, and a creature of simple pleasures...and today I miss my home.  For now I will have to sustain myself on the memory of home – knowing that it is all still there, waiting for me to return.  And THAT fills my heart with such gratitude...what a privilege to have such a lovely home to come home to.

This too shall pass...

I felt pretty okay immediately after the spinal injection.  However, the next day I went to occupational therapy in the morning and there the headache and nausea set in...in a big way.  It's a common side effect and is usually more extreme if the body has difficulty retaining water within the cells.  Apparently, my body has a lot of difficulty with this.

The next few days were rough.  One might say I was down for the count.  The headache and nausea were uber persistent and left me unable to do much other than lie flat in bed.  Sunday rolled into Monday, and with no relief in sight, they gave me an IV to try and help increase my hydration.  I tried to keep up with the therapies (they even brought physical therapy to my room), but any physical exertion resulted in more nausea and headache.

On Tuesday I still wasn't any better, so I had a second IV which included a dose of dexamethasone every four hours throughout the night and into the next day.  I wish I could say I was tough and fought through it like a champ, but I'm a sensitive soul...and the days upon days of feeling terrible, feeling disappointed, and feeling like it was never going to end left me a bit out of sorts.  I tried to stay as positive as I could...but there were tears and a few moments of I just want to go home.  Thank goodness for my lovely ones – and their sweet reminders that I am not alone.

It's interesting to step outside yourself in times like these and observe the variety of experiences occurring simultaneously within – the part of you that is devastated, the part of you that is trying to fight, the part of you that is trying to stay calm, and the part of you that simply endures.  In the end, there's really not much you can do other than let time do what time does best – pass.

And that's when you turn to Alexi Murdoch to help the time pass a little more gracefully.

The Ragged Sea by Alexi Murdoch.  I love this song. It's hard to describe why, but if I close my eyes I feel like I'm walking through a field of golden sunlight, feeling the fullness of life that is present in every moment – the anticipation of new, the memories of old...the loves, the losses – and then holding that feeling with a gentle tenderness, like holding a warm familiar hand.  It makes my heart content.

Spinal Injection Day

Last Friday was the first spinal injection.  I will be having eight stem cell treatments while here – 3 IV injections and 5 spinal injections.

There was a lot of buzz around this first spinal injection (Have you had a lumbar injection before? Is this your first time? Are you nervous? – all followed by Ah, don't worry!). Well of course I was a bit worried...I had no idea what to expect.  I ended up learning what was going to happen as it happened, and the entire process unfolded a little like something out of the Twilight Zone.

The process started at 1pm, at which point I was no longer allowed to eat or drink anything prior to the procedure.  At 3pm the nurses came by my room to start an IV.  Prior to every treatment they do an IV and give you a dose of dexamethasone (to help prevent side effects).  Then there was a bit of waiting (a lot of waiting).  Around 5pm, the nurses came by again and had me swallow a little purple pill (I later learned this was Xanax - to help me sleep afterwards), and then they wheeled me upstairs to the mysterious 4th floor.  We waited in the hallway with several staff and a few other patients...waiting to go behind the closed doors to which various staff members kept coming in and out.  Finally, it was my turn.

Behind the closed doors was a standard operating room...with several masked men (my Xanax was starting to kick in at this point – it all seemed a little surreal).  They hoisted me onto a gurney, had me lie on my side in a tight fetal position, and then did the injection.  They first do an injection of an anesthetic, which hurt for a second but wasn't that bad, and then I felt nothing else after that.  The first spinal injection includes a small withdrawal of your own spinal fluid for testing, followed by the injection of the stem cells.  The total time for the procedure was about five minutes and before I knew it I was lying flat and being wheeled away on the gurney back to my room.  It's important to lay flat for at least four hours immediately following the procedure – to allow your body to realign itself after the disruption of fluid in the spinal column.  So a team of nurses brought me back to my room and transferred me to my bed to rest.  Fortunately for me, I fell right asleep and woke up four later...at 10pm...very ready for dinner!

All in all, I think the anticipation of the event was worse than the actual event...and the best part is, now I know what to expect!

Confession

There is an element of posting all of these pictures that is hard – it's hard to see myself this way – in a wasted body...a shell of what I used to be.  I usually avoid looking at this reality, and live more in my mind and in my imagination – where the dreams of what could be reside.  I think it's a way of coping, preserving sanity sometimes.  

But, again, this is an exercise in my truth, as it is (and it's not always glamorous).  I have a meditation that I like (I've been listening to it since before I came here), and in one of the parts it says: more and more I can appreciate my body, be conscious of it, and fully inhabit it.  This takes on new meaning now.  What does it mean to fully inhabit one's body?  I think it means acknowledging it – not denying it.  It means looking at this person, with all her imperfections, and saying, YES, that IS me.  It means being present in my body – feeling the weakness, not fearing it – and then willing myself to move (no matter how small)...again and again.  Perhaps this process – of fully inhabiting ourselves (our whole beings) – is how we begin to shift out of wishful thinking and into the actual manifesting of our desires (whatever they are).  I've always been curious about this – for it seems that simply wanting something (no matter how strongly), doesn't necessarily create it.  (If you're interested, I find this guided meditation to be really lovely.)

I think I was a little naive prior to coming here about the degree of hard work this was going to take.  I was fully prepared mentally and emotionally to work for it...but it's different to actually be here and experience it.  This is a gradual process...it's about consistency and discipline.  It's not like you get an injection and feel improvement the next day.  You have to start where you are – which can be uncomfortable and hard and frustrating.  Sometimes they ask me to do something that seems so basic – lean forward slightly with the trunk of your body and then lean back.  It takes everything in me, all of my concentration, to make that part of my body move.  But there is great satisfaction in that as well – in giving something your all and feeling those long ignored muscles, as weak as they are, move.

The Philosophy

Functional Medicine is a patient centered approach to health that focuses less on naming diseases and managing symptoms, and more on the functional imbalance of the body.  The Better Being Hospital provides an individualized treatment and rehabilitation program that combines both the knowledge and wisdom of western and eastern medicine – and it follows the principles of the 4Rs:

Replace – recreate balance in your body’s basic systems by adjusting nutrition and nutrient absorption.

Repair – restore the body’s missing elements by stimulating the body’s own healing and regenerative abilities.

Remove – eliminate any remaining factors that intervene with the body’s working processes (for example, unwanted bacteria, toxic or heavy metal, waste that can’t be eliminated by the body, etc.).

Rebuild – find a way to stimulate the system to renew lost cells.

Everything I am being asked to do has a specific purpose and each therapy is being implemented to provide a piece of this larger picture.  I have now had a chance to experience all of the supportive therapies.  I previously shared the Occupational Therapy, Physical Therapy and Aquatic Therapy…here’s a glance at the Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy, Acupuncture and Nutrition.

The Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy (HBOT) is well…kind of a trip.  Imagine being Darth Vader…on a plane…trying not to have a panic attack.  That’s pretty much HBOT.

The treatment lasts an hour and during that time you’re breathing 100% oxygen in this pressurized chamber.  The idea is that typically oxygen is only delivered to your body via your red blood cells, but this treatment allows oxygen to enter your whole body directly (central nervous system, plasma, tissue, etc.).  So even areas that are damaged or have decreased circulation will get oxygenated – which stimulates your body’s natural ability to heal.

Acupuncture is a cake walk.  I have had acupuncture before so this was very familiar to me – and I really like it (perhaps I was a pin cushion in another life).  They rotate the areas of your body that will be targeted with each treatment.  We've done the lungs, liver, and immune system so far.

And then there’s nutrition.  As I mentioned, I am on a carb free diet (they call it a ketogenic diet).  The philosophy here is that a nutrient rich diet provides the body’s mitochondria with what it needs for optimal functioning.  Mitochondria are known as the powerhouses of the cell – they act like a digestive system which takes in nutrients, breaks them down, and creates energy rich molecules for the cell.  Since I’m being injected with millions of stem cells while here – this seems like a no brainer.  So far, I have been 100% compliant (no cheating here!).  But some things are better than others.

This was great.

This…not so much.

And then she fell in love...

As a kid I lived in water.  I could spend hours, literally, in the pool or the lake.  I loved it - because I was free.  I would dance and twirl, do head stands and pretend I was a million different things. There were no barriers.  All the things I couldn't do on dry land, I could do as a fish...in the water.

I haven’t been in the water in at least 10 years.  Somewhere along the lines it became too difficult to get in and out of pools and such.  A couple years ago I tried to find an aquatic therapy pool back home, but was unsuccessful.  The closest one I could find was in Huntington Beach, but it wasn't accessible (odd… for a therapy pool) - so my heart continued to long for its old familiar friend.

And then, this happened...

This is the moment I fell in love...again.